Trailer Trash: Episode Two
BMBR contributing writer Barrie ‘Mojo’ Morgan brings us the second episode of his Trailer Trash series, where he delves deep into the trailers for the Bad Movies we know and love and hate. Today’s episode takes a long and confused look at the trailer for the 2014 insult to humanity…Still Flowin: The Movie. Please address any hate mail to your local government representative, not us.
trailer trash – Still Flowin: The Movie
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The Trailer
yo yo yo raed ere. wats the fuckn shiznee on the motherfuckn biznee bitches? yo check dis cool as fuk trailer me and ma boyz dids. im in it and everyting. bitches be trippn…roll the fuckn tape dickhead!!
ps capital letters and punctumation are for bitches
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0:00 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (check it out!! 4 weeks of plannin went into dis title. we had meetings and big arno brought donuts and everything. solid)
0:12 – dats my bank account deets peeps. send sum cash to me as a tip after paying for dis masterpiece. fanks bitches. im funny as fuck i am.
0:23 – we practiced that hat slam for 6 hours. totally worth it. pivotal. and that “freakn dillusional arab bastard” line was all me. came to me in a dream.
0:28 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (just in case ya’ll missed it)
0:30 – just put my oscar on ice il be over later to pick it up yo. just call me daniel raed-lewis. stair at shoes. talk waps. in the bag bitches.
0:58 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (dats rite. third times a motherfuckn charm)
0:59 – where da fuck did dat bitch ass firework come from yo?!?! Answer: yo momma!
1:08 – at casting call for dis scene the only criteria for the journo scum was a killer tache. nailed it.
1:19 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (whoop)
1:20 – yo that shake spear bitch aint gah nuttin on dis suhlilo…sohlil…sololiq….speech yo!! damn i fucked up
1:33 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (yeahhh!! fuck yeahhh!!!)
BEST BIT: 1:34 to 1:56 – ne time the po po ask u questions just ask dem wut they reckn. “i dunno, wot u reckn?” frustrating as fuck yo. u can thank me 4 that tip by tipping. yo yo chill…im joking. I dont need ur motherfuckn money fuckhead!
1:56 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (what’s the movie called again? Dats wat the movies called. dont fuckn forgets its)
2:00 – dats me rappin and 2 guys saying how sick i am. at least, dats wat I finks happenin. not really sure ne more.
2:13 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (i was totally serious when i asked for a tip earlier. left my deets in der on purpoises. im all entrep…entrepenur…biznizzlike and shit)
2:31 – dis is how u close a fone. practicised dat for 4 hours.
2:33 – wolf screams. no practicising needed. im fuckin talented as shit yo.
2:36 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (last time. promise)
2:49 – dis is wat happns when you tell me it shud be spelt RAID. fuk no bitches. its r.a.e.2 da motherfuckn d. say it! R A E 2 DA MOTHERFUCKN D!!!!
2:51 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (one for the road yo)
2:55 – wut? down load aint 1 word brah. its 2. check it.
2:56 – mad skillz. fuckn mad skillz.
3:05 – “STILL FLOWIN THE MOVIE” (another one for da road yo)
END
in conclusion…
What movie was this for again? I forgot. What’s that? It appeared a whole 10 times during the trailer? Interesting. Must’ve missed it. It also makes me wonder what happened to the other ‘Still Flowin’s’. Like ‘still flowin the video game’ and ‘still flowin the surrealist art exhibition’. Seriously though, why is “The Movie” in the title of this movie??
Anyway, where do I start? This was amazing. I loved the horrendous acting, the terrible script (if there was a script), the janky editing, the soundtrack (particularly the piano near the start), the ramming of the aforementioned terrible title down your throat. I mean, how many times have you walked in halfway through a trailer and thought, “This looks great, I wonder what it’s called? Damn, missed the title at the start!” Never? That’s right, ‘cos you only ever have to give the title at the end of the goddam trailer! I think the title of this film and the amount of times it appears in the trailer say EVERYTHING you need to know about this. There should be an apostrophe at the end of “Flowin” for fucks sake. And why is it all in capitals and in inverted comma’s?? And why is the youtube title all in lower case??? It’s gloriously bad.
Loved every last second of it. R. A. E to the motherfuckn’ D!!!
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